Battle of the Bed

Rose is a very easy kid. Charming in all her looks and expressions - affable, giggly and compliant. I say leave Kitty, the all important attachment item at home, she leaves Kitty. But for the past week, she's been anything but compliant....her new enemy - sleep and her parents. Honestly, you might think I was talking about someone else if a hidden camera were capturing the war over a formerly effortless bedtime routine. It used to be that we would literally say goodnight, put her in her crib and walk away. But the golden age of crib prison has ended; she has tasted freedom, drunk the nectar of independence and will now do anything to elude the Sandman's soporific pleas. She suddenly hates going to sleep.

And she's really creative - vaulting, falling, using blankets as ropes. She even used a book as a stepping stool - the latest addition to her Macguiver escape repertoire. The girl is good - credit where credit is due. And though it's damn cute as she hauls her zebra pillow, her blankie and Kitty behind her in any given escape, the 47th time I put her to bed is decidedly less charming than the first. Parental patience meter running low. Chris and I have both yelled at her, for the first time in her sweet compliant life, putting a bit more of an edge behind our requests. The yelling hasn't been part of a grand plan, we just have nothing left. Her response to raised voice? An adorable "okay", followed by short head nod to seriousness, followed by quiet scheming, then consultation with her escape manual for scenario #318, followed by another deft crib vault.

The other night, we were in the middle of this intense battle, one parent putting her back to bed with firm tones, while the other cruised the Internet for suggestions. Apparently people have really strong feelings about cribs, crib escape, toddler bed transitions and the reward versus punishment systems for behavior modification. Our research confirmed why I don't do research. Some good ideas, but mostly all over the map. Either I'm looking for validation for my way or I'm a beast who should call Child Protective Services on myself. Anyway, nothing much helpful from Berkeley Parents Network. So, now Harper is in our bed, because she has to get up for work in the morning, Rosie is screaming, we've shut the door, we feel like beasts and she's tearing up the room. At which point, we decide we'll take her in our bed. We carry dreaming Harp to her bed, transfer snotty, hyperventilating Rose to our bed, then try again. At 11, the family who normally sleeps peacefully around 9:30, finally got to bed. Rose kicks Chris in the kidneys all night and we wake, repeat again for nap time, bed time, etc.

After four days of above scenario, at wits end, we finally find a workable solution; Rose now sleeps on a futon on the floor and we shut the door after only one escape. She doesn't like it, but she sleeps. And now we're all sleeping. And it's always better when the family sleeps. No matter what the people say on the Internet.